Connection

One thing I love about having all of the ws family blogs is knowing that we've all got such a connection. Nancy recently wrote a post that I could immediately connect with. (check it out here). I remember as a new mom going thru the exact same things Nancy went thru and being so incredibly exhausted and wondering why in the world I just wasn't cutting it as a mom. Our lives are so much better now because of Payton's ability to communicate....although we still have some really BAD days, I would not ever want to go back to the dark days we used to have.

Payton's summer has started out well. We tried t-ball, but have already quit. The anxiety she had before the game and actually just being able to process it all once she got there was too much for her. She said she just wants to play at home. And, that's fine with me. I have to remind myself a lot that her brain processes things so differently. While Bob, Koen and I might process everything at once, Payton is apt to try to process it all night and into the next day. I'm hoping when she gets older when can find something she's interested in special olympics.

Prolapse seems to be be Payton's biggest issue right now. Unfortunately I pretty much can't leave her alone right now because she loves to run to the bathroom and try to pull out the prolapse - which is hard to see her doing and difficult to make her understand how yucky it is. We went to a family get together this weekend and while everyone spent most of their time outside, Payton and I spent our time inside. She still prefers to do things by herself most of the time and doesn't really enjoy playing much. She just likes to do her own thing. Therefore, I just stay inside with her because I know what she's capable of if left alone for more than a few seconds :) Sometimes I wonder why Payton and I even go when we're spending a majority of the time in a different area than everyone else, but I have to consider it an improvement because in the past we usually didn't even attempt to go because she couldn't handle it. She can now, and that feels really good.

Koen just started another antibiotic for his ears and we are on a countdown to get his tubes put back in. It'll be nice for him to get that done. He gets pretty fussy but I really can't complain. Considering how he feels, he's still a pretty darn good little boy. He cracks me up because Payton has recently started having me cut every tag out of all of her clothings. She HATES tags (this is a new aversion) and guess who else immediately grabs his tag when I put his shirt on. Yep - you guessed it! Koen. He grabs a hold of the tag and says "ow, ow, ow" until we cut it out. I love how he watches her and wants to be like her. (don't like it with the meltdowns and tantrums....but I do believe we are getting that under control with him - even at the age of two I think he is able to see that she just can't control it). When we leave some where and she has to say goodbye to someone and is ofcourse screaming and crying, he just sits in the car and looks at me, like "here she goes again". I love that little man and already feel like I'm sensing some compassion in him. Oh, how I pray he has compassion.