Monday, January 7, 2008

Miracles

We had a really great weekend. The weather has been gorgeous here for the past few days - in the 70's. Payton has played and played and played outside while her daddy worked on trying to get the yard cleaned up from the ice storm. It was great to see her out running all over the yard. Koen is on his third round of antibiotic trying to clear up his stubborn double ear infection that doesn't seem to want to go away. It's crazy, even when he's sick he's a pretty darn good little boy. Unlike Payton as a baby, he can be soothed and it is the most amazing feeling for me as a mom to able to soothe him.

Last night Payton had crashed about eight o'clock and it was just Koen and I in the living room. The kitten (or kid, as Payton likes to call him) was hyper and ready to play as usual. I sat there in amazement while I watched Koen hold up this shiny granola bar wrapper in the kitten's face just waiting on Thomas to bat at it. Sure enough, Thomas would pounce at it and Koen would just laugh and laugh. I called Bob in the room to have him watch because I just could not believe Koen had already grasped the concept of holding up the wrapper, shaking it, and watching the cat pounce. Wow - he amazes me. I watch Koen walk around the furniture, try and interact with people, play in the floor with toys, and almost jump out of his skin with joy when his big sister Payton runs in the room. It's strange how different my emotions go up and down when I see these things happen. Yes, I feel pure joy and excitement. And, for a few split seconds my mind thinks "Wow! My baby boy is a genius!" When, in all honesty, I realize he is doing things in typical fashion....reaching his milestones when most babies do. However, at this point in Payton's life she wasn't quite sitting up yet and getting her to interact was nearly impossible. She worked so hard to do things that seem so easy for Koen and that ofcourse brings me some sadness.

Thankfully, Payton doesn't yet know any different but I think of the future and wonder what this world will treat her like. I pray all the time that God will give me the words and wisdom to help Payton understand that God created and designed her special for a purpose beyond our imagination. She's already taught me more in her four years of life than I ever thought I would know. Although, I know some day I will more than likely hear her say she just wants to be like everyone else. But, in my mind, I feel like I have two miracle babies. One that I'm so thankful she made it here and is beating many odds from the loss of genes that now define her life.....and the other one, my little man, who amazes me beyond belief at his ability to grasp things so quickly. Even though I know the things he does is typical, I consider it a miracle.

8 comments:

Every minute counts.... said...

Well said. It is so true, you go back and forth on those emotions. You made me tear up just thinking about it:)
Kids really are miracles, each and every one, for all of their own unique reasons. They each bring something different into your life.

Noel

Penny said...

Just what I was going to say Noel. They are all miracles!

Laura said...

I completely agree, for the all hard stuff that comes along with being a parent, there is so much more joy. They are all everyday miracles.

Katie said...

It truley is a miricle to watch the typical siblings develop with such seeming ease. I completely understand that bitter sweet feeling of pride and sadness all rolled into one.
xxoo

Heather said...

Me too, thankfully Caleb could care less at this point whether he can keep up with his sibs. I do worry mostly about the teen years. I asked him before about if he was going to drive a car when he gets older and he looked at me shocked and said "NO! I don't think that be a good idea Mom!"
Every child brings their own miracles to Earth with them. We are lucky we can be a witness to them.
xoxo, Heather

Julie said...

They are all miracles. I am in reverse from you though since I have older kids. I sometimes get frustrated with the girls when they are playing a video game or doing there homework and they don't get it right away. I think how much harder Noah has to work for just the little things. I know I shouldn't get frustrated with them, but I am human.

Amy said...

I am always amazed with typical kids, they do seem like little geniuses. Payton is gifted in her own way, and I know you already know that but I like to remind myself of that too.
XOXO
Amy

Kaycia said...

Tara,
You amaze me! You are a God's blessing to your family, me and so many around you. Your strength astounds me. I've always known you were strong and smart, but seeing you as a mother and woman I'm gaining much from your wisdom. You and Bob are always in my thoughts and prayers, I wish I could understand even a fraction of what you go through everyday. How did her Dr. appt go about the meds? Let me know if you can. Love you all so much.

Kaycia