Thursday, May 15, 2008
Anxiety is a tough thing - and it's hard watching your four year old have so much of it. It all started Tuesday evening when our town was under a tornado warning. All of our family came out and then some friends so we could all be in the basement. It was later in the evening, so everyone was only there about an hour or so....but in that amount of time you could tell she was nervous and ended up wetting her pants twice. We were able to get her to sleep around 11:30 that night but could still tell she was 'off'. Yesterday I got a call from the sitter because Payton wasn't feeling well and her eyes kept matting shut. Her eyes had done this for a few days but I kept chalking it up to allergies (along with her cough, runny nose, sore throat, etc). I ended up taking her to the doctor and realized she had pink eye and an upper respiratory infection....nothing a good ole antibiotic won't clear up quickly. I ofcourse don't like seeing her sick, but the hardest part for me is seeing the anxiety kick in. As soon as I told her we were going to the doctor she wet her pants....then about every five minutes on the way there she was saying "I go to doctor?". And because she was nervous, I think her senses must have been on high alert because driving next to semis, Koen babbling, everything set her off. And, ofcourse her routine was off. When I pulled into the driveway after the doctor's appointment she quickly realized her dad's car was not in the garage (she always looks for it after we get home from work and if he's not home yet she does NOT do well). So, because Bob was obviously still at work she lost it. I hate it when this happens because it doesn't just involve her and I anymore, Koen is involved. He now gets afraid of her (not only does she scream really loud but she gets pretty darn violent...embarassingly enough it doesn't take long for me to get afraid of her either). It made for a very long, exhausting day but we finally got her to sleep around midnight last night. I struggle right now because I feel bad for what it does to Koen. I realize as he gets older he'll do better with it - but right now it's tough seeing both Payton and Koen during her meltdowns.